hauntbaby:

Just heard a kid say “you’ve opened a can of worms, now lay in it.” More effective and terrifying than the originals tbh. 

hambaes:

if i ever give birth please dont tell me my baby looks just like me within the first 2 months cause i know that newborn look ugly as shit so unless you tryna square up dont speak

shounenchild:

angelwormwood:

angelwormwood:

does anyone else remember playing that swordfighting game on wii sports resort where you just swung your controller around like a madman wasting the shit out of everyone else in the game until you won

unrestrained summer fun

The Duality of

poompkin:

cat-n-tonic:

can you OD on vitamin D

that’s how icarus died

nostalgiaultra:

Me in the party: Gosh golly! This beat is… Whoo! This beat is… DANDY!

australian-government:

me (looking at my plants): why don’t we ever talk